Being The Ideal Woman (or not)

Who here watched Disney movies growing up?

I know, I know. Is that even a question? Well, I need to know. Because the amount of Disney films you watched as a kid could have had a serious effect on your self-esteem.

You of course all know what I'm talking about. What girl hasn't compared herself to Ariel or Jasmine at some point or another? Long, luscious, flowing, vibrant hair; big, soft, round, glowing eyes; complete grace whenever they walk; the ability to wake up in the morning with make-up apparently already on, because they're flawless; and, of course, their body shape.

Jasmine and Ariel both have very similar body shapes, neither of which are what you'd call anatomically possible. Their waists are about two inches thick from every angle (which can't be healthy -- I mean, where do their intestines go?), their hips and breasts are exactly the same width, and fairly large, their legs (or fins, as the case may be) are long, slender, and tapered; their feet and hands are tiny. They are barbie, but two-dimensional and not blonde.

Every girl has wanted to look like one of these two girls for at least a short time in their life. But why?

There is no way on earth anyone could look like these two girls. No one's eyes are that huge. No one's hair is that thick and still manageable. No one's waist is that freakishly tiny. I have friends who are naturally incredibly, incredibly skinny, and they are nowhere near that thin. On top of this, with bodies shaped like Jasmine and Ariel's -- wouldn't the poor girl just topple over?

But these two (FAKE) women are what the world, or the social media of the world, has deemed attractive.

Why the ever-loving heck is this attractive?

Sure, the girls are pretty. But they're freaking two-dimensional! They are so anatomically incorrect I don't know where to start. No one's body is that perfect. They are so fake I don't even know where to start.

Anyway, if the ideal was any different -- if, say, the "perfect woman" was chunky, pale, and short -- then Ariel and Jasmine would be considered down-right ugly. Any girl who looked anything like them would feel so terribly ugly and insecure... Which just shows you how flimsy this whole "ideal" thing is. Any decade now, the ideal could change -- probably will -- and then whoever doesn't fit the ideal will fade into the background of insecurity and self-loathing.

For example, compare the Disney Princesses of recent years to the early ones of the 30's, 40's, and 50's. Snow White, Wendy, Alice, and Cinderella are the epitomes of the ideal of that area. Small, quiet, demure, intent on finding husbands and keeping houses clean, no curves, thicker waists. That was what girls were "supposed" to look like. And if they didn't look like that, well too bad for them. They needed to make themselves look like that. Somehow.

Now, I don't look like Ariel. I don't look like Wendy. I look like Alice, but taller, and my hair isn't nearly as full.

I'm not the ideal girl, but I'm the ideal me.

My cousin Bekah is tall, skinny, curvy and graceful. She's got brown hair, freckles, a long nose. Actually, she has long everything -- arms, legs, smile, and toes, because she's a dancer. She's long, lanky and beautiful. She isn't the ideal girl, but she's the ideal her.

My friend Emily is tall, fair-skinned, fair-haired, and a big girl. She has a round face, round hands, and loves the colors pink and purple. She loves her body. She's big, round, and beautiful. She isn't the ideal girl, but she's the ideal her.

Really, people. Who is the ideal girl, and why do we need to be her? Why can't we just... be us? And be proud of it?

I don't understand. I don't think anyone really does. But I hope that any girl who reads this takes away this: that she doesn't have to look like Jennifer Lopez, or Ariel, or Snow White to be beautiful; that to be beautiful, all she has to do is be herself, because she is already beautiful.

And Ariel needs to learn that her identity is not defined by some guy, let alone one she doesn't even know.

Oh yes. There is an entire blog about the stupidity of "The Little Mermaid" coming up soon. So prepare yoursellllf.